Random Thoughts of a Dark Unicorn
by Thane Skysor
Summary: Sometimes, Ronodin has to remind the world who he is. Post Dragonwatch 3, one-shot
1. Chapter 1

If no one notices you, what are the repercussions? What happens when you abide by all the rules, but are still shunned as if your very existence is a slight against all life? Then congratulations, you are above the law. You are already free. Or halfway there, at least. No one suspects you if noticing you is beneath them.

I started with small things. Slurs, deviations from the normal, boring routine. Maybe someone would care enough to correct me then. Maybe someone would guide me back towards the light, or feel sorry enough to take a look.

Maybe I was wrong. I had the protection of innocence once, but it's long gone now. Innocence repels me like a reverse magnet. Sometimes I envy Seth. He doesn't appreciate what's been given to him, but I know better. He could have remade his life. It would have been easy. I haven't been giving him lies, I've been giving him new truths. Anything can be the truth when you're a clean slate.

I continued. Maybe helping the demons was a bit overboard. Maybe my dear uncle didn't deserve to be thrown into prison. He wasn't _my_ enemy. But he was my oppressor. One of them. What can I say? Some enemies don't admit to being enemies. Some don't even know that they're enemies. But at the end of the day, it's all the same. All they had to do was look in the right place. And they didn't.

Seth looked in all the wrong places.

It wasn't his fault.

Except it was.

I don't want to destroy you, Bracken said. Can we fight somewhere else, blah blah blah. Like I don't even matter, like I'm something you can just blow off and forget about. You've always been a procrastinator, Bracky, and you haven't changed a bit. You don't want to change. Nobody wants to change. So that's why they consider it a crime to want to change, to want to be different. Having the moral high ground means nothing. You've taken lives too. A life is a life.

Orange and gray? That's not a bad color combination. White on white is worse, anyway. Orange and gray is the color of fire and smoke, of ashes and embers. White on white? All I can think of is human food. Milk and cream. Rice pudding. Mayonnaise.

Yuck!

Try and name something stupid that's orange and gray. That's right, you can't. A moldy orange? Nice try! I'm darker than that. A pencil? That's not even orange, and even if it was, it's good for stabbing.

Try again. It's what I always do.

Some think this is all a game to me. It's not. Wait, maybe it is. Even I get confused, and that's totally fine. I have all the time in the world, and I can use it in any way I want. I have no schedule, and those who try to impose one on me can jump into a volcano.

I'm not a sore loser, either. So Bracken messed up my horn? I'll figure something out, I always do. Confidence is a hard habit to break. So is darkness.

You want to be my friend, human? I can be the best friend you ever had. I can play dress-up with you, put your makeup on so you look nothing like how you used to. I can feed you potions that will turn you into a bird so you can fly wherever you want. They used to tell me that I'm nothing. Do they say the same things to you? I disagree with them.

You want to fight me, little human? I could use the practice. What's the matter? It's all a game anyway. Be more positive.

I like to Google things. I don't hate technology. Maybe right now I'm looking you up. Maybe I'm typing your name into the search bar as you read this.

Gotcha.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: It seems unbelievable (as a relatively new author) that I've gotten 14 views in less than 24 hours. I hope that I can maintain 1 update per day, because Ronodin's twisted mind is a dark and constantly shifting landscape that... Okay, I've said enough. I'll let you read the story now.

We don't really need to sleep, being unicorns and all. But I'm all about breaking barriers when they need to come down. All barriers need to come down, in my opinion. And I say I want a nap. Besides, I've gotten used to it. Practicing with my horns gets exhausting.

When I woke up, I found myself almost surprised when I remembered that Seth was not in my immediate vicinity. No, I do not miss him. I've only become accustomed to his presence.

I don't miss Seth in the least. I wouldn't miss him even if his vocabulary consisted of "I-will-serve-you-forever-oh-dark-lord." We're even now. He helps me with my debt, I let him go. And yes, I _let_ him go. I could have devoted more effort to keeping him under my control. Oh well. Life goes on.

Bracken? He _owes_ me. He was literally born in debt. And I'll be exacting my revenge soon enough. I don't want to think of what he's done to me. That kind of thinking is useless.

But if you think that means that I'll forgive him, know that you're dead wrong! Everyone loves a good revenge scheme.

Sometimes I get tired of the magical world. Sometimes I like to venture into the dull world of unbelievers and see how much trouble I can cause. It's harmless trouble. Either way, it's the humans who are doing the killing.

When your history teacher asks you what caused the Great Depression? Tell them it was a dark unicorn. Because it was.

And yes, before you get suspicious, I confirm, and will continue to maintain, that I have lived for that long. Unbelief is toxic to many magical creatures, but it's never stopped me. Do you want to see my human imitation? Maybe you already have. I'm all over social media, but you probably wouldn't recognize me.

In fact, I may be in the human world now. Of course I won't tell you where, but I'll give you a hint for your trouble. It's somewhere near Fablehaven.

Of course, _everywhere_ is near Fablehaven when you're in the Underking's good graces.

I hear there's a virus spreading around. Humans are running about, trying to go about their everyday lives, while the virus follows them and claims them. It's so funny how something so small can disrupt even the most basic of things.

The human world has some truly wonderful things. Everywhere I go, I see change. Stagnation is easier to fix in this world. I'm not so different from you people after all. Humans don't cling on to mindless doctrines like light-makes-right.

I may act like humans are inferior. But you guys do that too, don't you? And you're still the same old species.

I may engage in foolish displays to show my strength at times. You think you're any better? Well, at least I don't need a gun to prove it. At the same time, guns are incredibly fun to watch. Little humans killing each other from a distance. More deadly than arrows.

And why is it exactly that the magical world insists on sticking to arrows? Can't somebody build a magical gun that works better than a magical bow? Shouldn't be too hard.

Maybe if I learned how to form my intact horns into automatic machine guns. Bracken won't even be able to cower in terror, because he'll already be dead.

That's actually a smart idea. Arrows are easier to deflect than bullets. It's just the logistics of the whole thing I need to work out. Or I could just ask for more favors.

Or, more accurately, coerce people into doing favors for me.

I realize that I sound like the villain here. The aggressor. Why is it that people associate this behavior with villains? Because the winners write the stories.

Here's one difference. I, like them, intend to win, and I am not a loser. Not for long. Never again. Bracken lost to me many, many times, and I have faith in him. I have faith that when he falls again he'll find it within to himself to suck it up and let me enjoy my victory. Maybe I'll even give him Kendra. But first I'll have her dipped in acid.

You think that's disgusting? Like you haven't wished worse on someone you hate.

The hour grows late (or rather I'm getting quite bored sitting here) and I have work to do.


End file.
